Of all Five Protective Factors (aka Five Strengths), Social Connections is the strongest predictor of well-being. When we have positive, accessible connections with supportive others in our lives, we can ask them for help, find emotional support, and share parenting experiences and information. These positive experiences also build resilience and help support children’s social and emotional competence.
- Knowledge of Parenting and Child Development: Parenting as Children Grow
- Concrete Support in Times of Need: Knowing How to Find Help
- Parental Resilience: Building Inner Strength
- Social Connections: Connecting with Others
- Social and Emotional Competence of Children: Helping Kids Understand Feelings
Why are Social Connections such a strong Protective Factor?
Humans are social beings! From the very beginning, we are wired to connect. The first relationships are essential for our very survival. When a baby is born, parents’ brains go through transformations so that the social awareness areas are strengthened. Loving touch and social experiences stimulate the release of oxytocin, the “peace and calm” hormone. Social experiences also release dopamine, just like other rewarding experiences. When we are in social situations with people that we like, we automatically start to mimic each other’s gaze direction, postures, and emotional expressions – and our brain and heart-rate patterns get in sync with one another! In one study, young adults who didn’t know each other were asked to talk about an emotional or neutral event together, and their heart rates started to synchronize! Another study found that biological synchrony was stronger between friends than strangers. In a way, supportive social connections are like the oxygen we breathe and the food we eat, and we literally resonate with sympathetic others when we interact with them (especially during emotionally supportive interactions).
Strengthening Social Connections
All of this sounds great, but what do you do if you are a parent and have no supportive family close by or friends to reach out to for companionship or support? Life is already incredibly busy (especially for parents) and it can be hard to find time to go out and meet new friends. On top of that, parents need friends who understand the importance of the children in their lives and who they can trust to be around their children. Where do you begin?
Look for opportunities in your area
First, see if there are opportunities to connect with other parents in your neighborhood or area. United Way of Utah County offers Community Centers in Provo, Payson, and American Fork. Here, and in Salem, you can find Welcome Baby Playgroups, Ready to Learn classes, and other gatherings for young children and their parents. All parents and caregivers are welcome! Help Me Grow Utah offers Learn and Grow Playtimes at libraries across the state, as well as other events, such as Books, Balls, and Blocks. You can find calendars for all of these events here (or follow us on social media to stay informed).
Across the state, there are other opportunities, such as the 2025 Baby & You classes in Salt Lake and Davis counties, organized by Promise Partnerships of Utah. United Way of Northern Utah has Playgroups where both parents and children can meet new friends. Promise Partnerships offers and the Circles out of Poverty program in Carbon, Davis, Salt Lake, Utah, Washington, and Weber counties. Circles focuses on fostering connections between participants, which strengthens their resilience and support networks. Local libraries usually offer story times and other activities for young children. Once your child starts to attend school, there are usually parent nights where you can meet other parents and make new friends.
Even before your baby is born, there are opportunities to meet other expecting parents in birth education classes (offered by many hospitals) or prenatal yoga classes, for example. After giving birth, it is harder to get out and meet new people. A good option can be to participate in a home visiting program, which can offer some of that social support as well as child development and parenting information and connection to other resources. All new parents can request home visits from the Welcome Baby programs at the United Ways of Utah County and Northern Utah (which serves Weber, Box Elder, Cache, Davis, Salt Lake, and Summit Counties). There are also other home visiting programs across the state, such as Parents As Teachers (PAT) and the Nurse-Family Partnership (NFP).
Virtual options & Parent Support Groups
Virtual social connections are a good option if there are no in-person options available, or it’s preferred for other reasons. There are various postpartum support groups in Utah and nationally, which can be really helpful to share experiences and show that you are not alone! If you have a child who was diagnosed with autism, the Utah Parent Center has a list of support groups where you can find opportunities to meet parents in a similar situation. In many areas, there are also parent groups that you can connect with via social media or apps like meetup.com.
A note on making friends as a parent
Many parents find it challenging to make (or keep) friends. Not only are there barriers like time constraints, but many also feel anxious or insecure about approaching others to make new connections. Remember that many other parents of young children are in the same boat! They, too, might be wishing for a new friend to share the parenting journey with, or simply to do things together that you both enjoy. If you experience social anxiety, this article offers a helpful list of tips for how to help you engage in social activities. Here are a few other suggestions:
· When you meet other parents (e.g., at a playground or your child’s school), ask them about their child or make a nice comment about them! This breaks the ice and offers them a chance to ask about you and your child as well.
· Consider whether you could volunteer at your child’s school or community events, to get to know new people. You will already have things in common with others who attend these events, and it offers opportunities to get to know other parents. Volunteering and helping others also feel good to most people and can strengthen your own well-being.
· Don’t give up if the first attempt does not work out! There are many factors that can explain why someone does not immediately.
· Keep taking care of your own needs, such as doing mindfulness practices, exercising, or taking a walk (see Parental Resilience blog). You matter!
One last note: you can always call your Help Me Grow Utah Parent Support Specialist (PSS) to ask about parenting groups, events to go to with your children, or other social connection opportunities. Best of all, your PSS will offer you a friendly voice and listening ear, and that’s social connection right there!
