My first child was born in early 2021. Due to pain management, it took several hours for me to attempt nursing. When I was ready, the nurses asked if I wanted to try breastfeeding. Of course, I said yes. I saw breastfeeding as my duty as a new mother. The idea of nursing came with anxiety, but I was determined to be successful. A lactation specialist came in during our brief hospital stay and showed me the basics of nursing. My son was quite sleepy, as newborns are naturally in their early stages of life. I was given a breast pump and began using it in the hospital to jumpstart my milk supply. What I will now tell you is that I never successfully breastfed my son. I tried for months before resolving to use a breast pump for the first year of his life. Below I will share the different breastfeeding “tools” I tried, why nursing may be difficult for you, share community resources that can help support breastfeeding, and conclude with why you’re still enough if all else fails.
Tools to Help Baby Latch
- Nipple Shield: A nipple shield helps create a stronger latch, especially for moms with inverted or flat nipples, and provides a barrier between you and your baby’s mouth. They come in different sizes, so make sure you get the right one.
- Nursing Syringe: Given by my hospital, this syringe has a line on one end that could be fed through the nipple shield while you slowly push down on the syringe. This can help a child learn where to come for milk before your supply has come in fully. In conjunction with the nipple shield, it helps baby latch onto flat or inverted nipples.
- Nipple Everter: Draws out flat nipples for an easier latch.
Why Nursing Might Not be Working
My son and I learned after almost three months of trying to nurse, why it was more difficult for us to be successful. He had a high pallet which made it difficult for him to get a good latch. Women with flat or inverted nipples may also struggle. Having a premature baby can also delay or make nursing difficult because there is a delay in the opportunity for mom and baby to begin nursing. There are so many reasons it may be difficult!
Community Resources That May Help
There are several community resources that can help address your challenges in nursing. WIC stands for Women, Infants, and Children and is a federal nutrition program. In addition to helping with food needs, they offer one-on-one support from a breastfeeding expert. This is someone with special experience and training who can help you with latching, milk supply issues, and more. Another option is to contact a lactation consultant in your area. A lactation consultant is a health professional who specializes in breastfeeding. Additionally, you can contact your doctor for further suggestions.
When Nothing You Try Works
Despite trying several different “tools” and community resources, nursing became a stressor for my son and me. He learned the bottle was easier and it made it even harder to make progress. I decided that it wasn’t worth my sanity to continue nursing. I wish I could say that from the day I made that decision I was totally happy. I had regrets. I felt like a failure. It was hard! What I can tell you is that you aren’t alone.
Nursing isn’t for everybody. Fed is best! Whether you wanted to nurse and had difficulties or couldn’t, you are not a failure. Your child isn’t going to remember how you fed them, they are only going to remember that they were fed, clothed, and loved.
